surprised-baby-280x280If your name meant “has no intelligence and is rather annoying,” would it bother you? Would you care if your baby’s name meant “smells like yak fur”? Even the prettiest-sounding names can fool you when it comes to their odd, sometimes ooky meanings. If you’ve got a thing for meaningful monikers, here are a few beautiful baby names you might want to be careful of.

Colin
If you go long on the “o,” some military-types may immediately think of Colin Powell, the retired U.S. Army four-star general and 65th U.S. Secretary of State. But let’s be honest, most people are gonna think of that organ responsible for #2.

Mary Jane
Although this cute little combo brings to mind thoughts of precious little black patent leather shoes, it might also bring to mind Snoop Dogg’s favorite nine-leafed plant. Of course, YOUR Mary Jane’s beauty will be all people think about once they see her. (Depending on how hard they partied in college …)

Dick, Johnson, Willy, Rod, Woody
Enough said.

Pippa
Princess Kate’s stunning younger sister has a name that means “lover of horses,” but if you’re living in Greece, it’s also slang for a rather, ahem, lewd act. Fortunately most of us non-Mediterranean types are picking it due to our “love of Pippa Middleton.” Hey, what’s not to love?!

Alexia
Love is blind … and so is the meaning behind this name. This sweet nickname for Alexandra is also a neurological disorder that causes word blindness. Such a pretty name for such an unfortunate situation, dontcha think?

Kennedy
For decades, this name conjured up images of Camelot, political leaders and hunky John Jr. Unfortunately, its meaning isn’t quite as hunky as the man. In name-speak, Kennedy = misshapen, helmet head. (Of course, if anyone could rock the helmet hair, it was definitely Jackie O.!)

Suri
As TomKat gazed into their little diva’s big blue eyes and dreamed of days dressing her in tiny Marc Jacobs flats, they were probably thinking of “princess” and “red rose,” possible Hebrew and Persian meanings behind the name. If they had only known that it means “pig” in Punjabi, “pointy nose” in Indian and “pickpocket” in Japanese.

Randy
Like many in the United Kingdom, Austin Powers was fond of this term to describe his very, very, very, very strong feelings of, um … love. But frankly, if it weren’t for people feeling randy, there probably wouldn’t be many Randys!

Gilbert
Just because this was the name of Johnny Depp’s character in What’s Eating Gilbert Grape? doesn’t necessarily make it hot. This retro name has been British slang for a green glob of spit since the 1950s.