BabyNamesWorld  /  Message Boards  /  General Chat  /  Need opinions from people looking in from the outside

Need opinions from people looking in from the outside

  • lilybell
    lilybell
    Participant

    I am a self-employed nanny. I work for 4 different families.
    3 of the 4 are only children and both parents work so I watch the kids when they overlap.
    The fourth family is 4 kids and the mom is a SAHM and her husband works out of town a lot. One of the 4 is in kindergarten and then one in preschool and the twins are 18 months. So I watch the younger kids when she has appointments or errands to run and she has to take her second son to preschool.
    Today she tells me she needs me every week Tuesdays and Fridays. I told her the one day in January that I couldn’t and then informed her that I would let her know for the upcoming months at least a week and a half before the beginning of the month when I get the rest of the families schedules.

    She then asked if I was working for anyone else. I said yes I was working for two of the other three when I started working for her. She then got upset and asked where their family was when in my priorities. I tried to explain it’s not a first second third fourth priority if they overlap I have a lot of things to take into consideration.

    She then says that I should have informed her that I added a fourth family, I added the fourth family this summer when I hadn’t heard from her in almost two months.

    So am I wrong for having 4 families. 99% of the time it’s not a problem all the other families understand that I can’t support myself only working for one family. If the others overlap I’m able most of the time to take the kids to each others homes. This family lives in a different city almost an hour drive away.

    This mother also doesn’t “go” to work she can take the twins with to take her son to preschool. I realize it’s inconvenient but it can happen. The other parents need me so they can go to work.

    So am I wrong? What would you have said to her?
    What would your reaction be if you had a nanny that also worked for other families?
    I just need people’s opinions that aren’t my family.
    My mom and fiance think that there’s something else that’s bothering her and I need to just let it go that I’m not doing anything wrong.
    I am the kind of person that feels bad about everything even if I have nothing to do with the problem and so I’m having a really hard time not feeling horrible about this.

Viewing 8 replies - 1 through 8 (of 8)
  • Momkey
    Momkey
    Participant

    No, you are not wrong for taking on the fourth family! You could always tell her that you had not heard from her for the two months when you took on the fourth family, so you did not really know if she was going to keep you on or not! Why is she needing you those days? Consider why she needs you to come! Is she taking classes or doing something that restricts her from taking care of the kids herself?


    embra
    Participant

    If she is willing to engage you full time, then she has the right to expect that you will be available every day. If she is not, then she has the right to expect that you will be there for any regular hours that the two of you have agreed on ahead of time (barring sickness or emergency), and on a first come first serve basis for any other hours that she wants to engage you for. Please. Princess needs to get over her bad self. You are doing nothing wrong. Also, I hope she is paying you extra for gas.

    Inga
    Inga
    Participant

    If she’s switching days on you, she can’t expect that you automatically would have zero activities going on during those times. You have to pay your own bills and there’s nothing wrong with taking jobs during the times that were previously off-hours. If she’s an otherwise reasonable person, she was probably just having a bad day and disappointed/surprised with the scheduling conflict. Getting a good sitter is a major pain in the butt! I think you are being completely reasonable and if she brings it up again, I agree with Momkey that you should be upfront about the fact that you took on another family because she hadn’t called for six months. Even if she doesn’t like that answer, I would hope she’d see on some level that you need to work and if she’s not calling you, you’ll likely find something else to fill the schedule.

    lilybell
    lilybell
    Participant

    momkey- she needs me those days to watch the twins while she takes her younger son to preschool and so she can run errands

    embra- she doesn’t pay any extra for gas. But she pays more per hour than the others, but she also has more kids than the others.

    inga- i did tell her I took on the other family when she hadn’t needed me for 2 months. At the time she had two nannies I just assumed the other was getting all the hours.

    I tried to say that I have to think of myself and my family as well. I’m getting married and going to try to start a family of my own soon. I can’t just wait by the phone. Thank you all for being supportive about what I did it really helps.

    Magster
    Magster
    Keymaster

    Ditto what embra said.

    gaamy
    gaamy
    Participant

    i agree with Embra.

    i also agree with your family that something else is probably bothering her, esp if you havent noticed any jerky tendencies previously.

    TwoSapphires
    TwoSapphires
    Participant

    I agree with embra and Inga, too.

    jasonlovessara
    jasonlovessara
    Participant

    I agree with what the other ladies have already have said. Unless she can employ you full time then she can not expect you to be there when she does not have a set schedule.
    Maybe she is overwhelmed. When my kids were 18 months I was overwhelmed and I did not have others ;)
    Unless she gives you a hard time again I would let it go – try not to let her second guess yourself. I think what you are doing is great

Viewing 8 replies - 1 through 8 (of 8)

Funny Videos for Moms