embraParticipant8 months, 3 weeks ago
Did you (or do you plan to) keep your own last name when you got (get) married? Would you care if your daughter did or didn’t? Where you are living now, would people be upset if a married woman kept her maiden name?
TwoSapphiresParticipant8 months, 3 weeks ago
I changed my maiden name into a second middle name and added my married name at the end. I often use Amy Maidenname Marriedname on things (professionally, FB account, etc.). I wouldn’t really care if my DD did or didn’t, if I had a daughter.
Where I live I don’t think people would be upset about it but it’s not super common.
lilybellParticipant8 months, 3 weeks ago
I plan to change my name. But my mom, her sister and one of my dad’s sister’s kept her maiden name. It wouldn’t be a big deal if a woman kept her name.
gaamyParticipant8 months, 3 weeks ago
no one would care here. no one in my family would care either though i would be the only woman in our family who has chosen to do so. most people assume i am “mrs hubby” any way. i answer to both, but intend to keep my name when and if we ever decide to go do the paper work.
ducklingsParticipant8 months, 3 weeks ago
I’ll be keeping my name when we marry. I like my name and I personally don’t like the history or traditional meaning of taking on the male’s name. To that effect, my girls can do whatever they want, though it would be preferable for them to keep their own names.
My partner couldn’t care less about whether I take his name or not- a family isn’t defined by a surname.
I’m in the pacific NW which is generally pretty cool about most things. I would assume that it’s well received here for a woman to keep her name.
jasonlovessaraParticipant8 months, 3 weeks ago
No one here would care but it personally would bother me. It wasn’t even a consideration to not take his name.
I don’t care what my DD does – what ever makes her happy – I think it is a very personal choice and as long as you are doing what makes you happy then you are doing the right thing
Anabel ConnerKeymaster8 months, 3 weeks ago
My name has stayed just the way it is. Marc had no preference as to what I did at all. My name is “me” so I didn’t really think too hard about changing it. I think its really an individual’s choice. I would never judge someone one way or another. I guess some people might think its odd that I didn’t change my name, but I think most of the people that have mentioned it to me in a questioning manner have been older people, where they had just never thought to do anything but change their name when they married.
jenni_lynn91Participant8 months, 3 weeks ago
My boyfriend is Mexican, so he has two last names. The first last name is his father’s last name, and the second last name is his mother’s. We agreed that when we get married I will take his first last name (father’s). Our children will also have that last name. I would not care if my daughters chose to keep their last name, change their name, or have both last names. It is a cultural thing whether women change their name or keep the name when they get married. In many Hispanic cultures, the woman keeps her parent’s last names and the children are given the last names of both parents. His sister doesn’t understand why I am changing my last name to his.
MyosotisParticipant8 months ago
I don’t think my last name suits me, so I’m probably going to change it, unless the guy I eventually come to marry has a really bad surname. I’ve got loads of cousins and 4 of them are guys so the family name can live through them.:P I really don’t mind what my future daughter does, surnames really don’t matter much to me.
NMteacherParticipant8 months ago
I followed TwoSapphires’ example, with my maiden name as my second middle name. On some documents they have actually pushed my middle name, Marie into my maiden name and made it one name, which looks funny. Overall, I am glad I did it that way, as it has made the transition easier…things like a credit card I still have in that name, my teaching license, college degree, insurance info, cashing checks, are less of a hassle when I can still show that my maiden name is part of my legal name. I don’t ever hyphenate or use my maiden name as a last name, though. I have also found that most places don’t let you use 2 middle initials, so on some very official things I am HMB and others HKB, and I just hope that never causes a problem.
I like the tradition of having one new name together, and don’t have any trouble with the idea of joining my DH’s family, but it is definitely just a tradition so I don’t think there is anything wrong with doing things differently if you want to.